Bad Week!!

It's been kind of a hell week that I have hardly time for myself, let alone update this blog... The signs were there.. The moment I woke up on Monday morning, I wasn't feeling that good... My stomache just ain't right... I kept farting and shitting man!! Hehe... Anyway, the former isn't that bad after all.. For the first time, I managed to thrash Daryl in one of our 'fart wars'... The score: 6-0... Fun man!!! You all should try it... You will score one goal if you manage to fart at your opponent... But your butt must be in the direction of your opponents and it must be loud enough to be heard... Silent farts would be ruled out as offsides.. Hahaha... Anyway, my first goal (I mean fart) is beautiful man... Daryl and I were in the GIS lab and suddenly I felt that the moment is coming... So I concentrated to make that fart counts... Man, not only is it loud, it smells bad!!! Hahaha... Thank god at the point of release, no one else was in the lab.. By the time someone enters the lab, I was glad that the smell has dissipated (probably all of it has ended up in his lungs... Kekekeke...)

Other than that cheap-thrill event, the whole week was filled with group discussions.. Sianz man... Got 2 bloody presentations next week of which one was only made known yesterday... Haiz... To make matter worse, one of my group members sucks big time man.. Feel like giving him one big punch whenever he made a comment which he thinks is damn smart one.. Doesn't mean you are from business you are much better than me lah in e-commerce... ASS!!!

At least today was ok... Went back to BPGHS to catch the Teachers' Day celebration... The performances were great especially the first band.. Damn impressed by the lead singer man... The food delight was awesome except that every food the students offered to me had to do with chocolates.... Haha... And yeah, the melted Ben & Jerry's ice cream was fantastic...

Think I'm falling sick... It certainly doesn't help that it has been raining and me getting drench from riding for two days straight.. Sighz... Not going to study today.. My brain kind of saturated.. Tomorrow maybe...

On a different note, I just realised that besides my students, there are other people who have been reading my blog... Hahaha.. YES!! I'm refering to you who's reading this now.. Happy reading and stay in touch!!!

Legend

Was just trying my luck to see whether or not Youtube has the music video of 'Lagenda' by Sheila Majid.. What do you know?? They have it.. This is the song which Hady sang during the previous episode of Singapore Idol...

This song is a tribute to the all-time Malay film-industry legend, P. Ramlee... Almost every Malaysians and Malays would know and could identify this legendary star as being THE best... His films are a hit with every generations; past, present and even future...

Ironically though, P. Ramlee is not really a 'pure' Malay.. He is of Acehnese descent... For those who don't know the current situation in Malaysia, the Malays in our dear neighbouring country do not identify the Acehnese as being part of the Malay group.. The latter is deem to belong to a lower class status and very often being called 'dirt' and 'orang seberang'... Thus, it is funny that they can accept P. Ramlee, who, by contemporary popular Malay Malaysian society definition, is part of the 'dirt' himself...

It's disheartening to see the world being embroiled in such examples of racism... This even exist in this tiny island where 'we' called our 'home'... The PM's speech on embracing certain foreigners only are implicitly filled with racist and class connotations... As Singapore is set to be the centre-stage in hosting one of the biggest event of 2006, it still, in my opinion, fails to play the role of a good host if 'we' continue to possess the attribute of selective xenophobia...

The Importance of the English Language??

After spending several hours at my favourite haunt studying, reading and thinking through what I’ve read, I felt overwhelmed by the numerous complex vocabularies which came hurtling at me.. Without the aid of my ever-so trusted dictionary.com, I painstakingly attempted to fathom the articles which I was navigating through by proceeding on to the subsequent phrases, sentences and paragraphs, in the hopes of understanding the context of these articles..

Along with many other reasons, my limited grasp of the English language proves to be the hindrance, and a discouragement, to further pursuing my studies (masters or even PhD)… Even though, my command of the English language has drastically improved over the past few years, I feel that it is still not up to mark in order for me secure a job as an academic in higher learning institutions… Comments from lecturers warning me to be wary of using too much ‘Fadzly-ism’ in my writings and to be cautious of ‘phraseology’ are quite common…

Is English really that important?? After all, I’ve been taught, using this language ironically, to be critical about the ‘western’ enlightenment project of which colonialism and imperialism are its most well-known tools… By using the English language, it seeks to further strengthen and solidify the hegemony that ‘western’ thoughts have attained and seeking to sustain… To add on, is it true that the English language is much more superior than other vernacular languages?? Ideas are oft thought in colloquial and ‘local’ terms before translated to English… As a result, meanings are often lost in translation…

However, I am aware of the pragmatism behind the usage of the English language… It is a common and ‘universalize’ tool of communication…There is a need to relate ideas and thoughts in the English language in order to have a wider and extended reach… Besides that, I couldn’t imagine myself writing this blog entry in the Malay language in which the Singapore government has so conveniently labeled it as my ‘mother-tongue’…

This debate seems to be rotating in one complete cycle and looks unlikely to be resolved.. Nevertheless, I think it’s good to ponder about this kind of questions.. It certainly is a food for thought (I so hate this phrase ever since my recent relief teaching stint due to one of the ‘big heads’ in the school who just love to use this phrase.. Hehehe..)… Is the English language really that important and to what level should our command be in order to enable us in proclaiming ourselves as masters of the language??

Votes Casted

Yesterday was the first time in weeks that I managed to catch Singapore Idol.. What people say seems to be true.. This season's contestants are not as good as the first one...

However, one of the contestants totally stood out.. HADY MIRZA!!! Yeah man.. He's damn good.. Better than Taufik... Unfortunately, Singaporeans (mostly the teenage girls I guess) are deaf.. They are very occularcentric and because of that, fucked up contestants such as that 'monkey' is still around... He sings off tune all the time.. And what is so good-looking about him?? If you take a closer look, his nostrill seems to flare-up and I won't blame anyone who mistook it for a pig's snout...

Let's stop making this contest into a big joke and vote wisely if you want to support any contestants... For me, this is the first time this season where I start to cast my votes... No marks for guessing who I am voting and rooting for.. Hehehe...

(P.S. The music video featured would be dedicated to that 'monkey' if he gets ousted out tonight.. Lol...)

Spot the Shining Object

Just received the picture taken at the MOE Teaching Award Presentation the other time... Me and my future big boss!!! Kekeke... I burst out laughing the moment I saw it... So, is my pearly white teeth shining or is it being overshined by other reflective object?? Lol....

Mixed Monday

Second week of school... What a day it has been man.. It was vacillating from bad to good, to bad and to good again...

Was trying to clear up all my readings before the new week began and succeeded - just barely though... Was finishing it while watching Chelsea thrashed the hell out of Manchester City... Woohooo!!!

Tried to get some sleep after that... Damn it!! I don't know why I just couldn't get that all so precious sleep.. Tossed and turned.. The last time I stared at my handphone, to see the time, it was 2 in the morning liaoz.. Crap!!! Only 3 1/2 hours of sleep...

All afresh (not really lah, was hoping that I could still continue with my sleep), I head down to start my bike and head towards school.. Tyres punctured!!! Sighz... So visited the petrol station along the way and get them pumped...

Morning traffic greeted me in a not so friendly way.. Was riding along Upper Bukit Timah Road when suddenly, I saw a whole trail of red lights... F***!!! I hate the 845 a.m. traffic man.. Worst, I have to face it every Monday and Tuesday this semester...

Got into class on the dot.. Then 3 hours of boring lecture... Luckily Higgits cracked some jokes if not I swear I could have continued with my beauty sleep... At the end of the class, I tried to organize a Geography Honours Soccer Team.. So far - only 4 people!! Support people, support...

That was followed by the ever so mundane job of photocopying readings.. Crap sia... $10 gone just like that, from my cashcard, photocopying readings which are only for 2 lectures..

Well, at least the day is over... Headed down then to the school which I did relief teaching at the past two months... Hmmm.. Oklah, don't think can keep this a surprise anymore since quite a number of students saw me juz now already.. Went back there to rehearse with my NIE trainee friends for a Teacher's Day performance.. Yes, yes... We are going to perform on Teacher's Day... It was fun... There's actually an agenda for us to perform but let it remain a secret... Hehehe...

Vacillation... Ended? Nope... Check my mail... SHIT!!!!!! I didn't get the tutorial slot which I had balloted for.. I'm so going to kill the administrators of CORS if I'm forced to come back on Thursday for a stupid 1 hour tutorial for a module which I only need to get a pass....

So there you go... Tomorrow? Tuesday... 8 hours of lessons back to back... The only consolation is that I love 2 out of the 3 lessons which I have tomorrow... But still, Monday is not over... Any more oscillations?? I hope not cause I can't take it anymore!!!!!!

'Villainising': The Important Ingredient in Proliferating Further the Good and Evil Dichotomy

I know some of you might be thinking why is the title of this entry sound so like the title of a journal or an academic piece of writing? Hehe.. I'm trying to get myself back in the groove and gain back the rhythm and momentum of writing papers...

Lately, the Malay entertainment industry is being shaken by the news about the wedding of Malaysian pop queen, Siti Nurhaliza, with this old chap called Datuk K... She's being labelled as the third party who is so cruel and evil to destroy a happy family... Ever since the news broke free in the press, tongues have been wagging... Here (I mean my own home), news updates are rapid and frequent.. The two sources: The television (of course) and the telephone... How is the latter possible you might ask? Well, it's amazing how my mum, aunties and grandma manage to infiltrate into the latest gossips and lend a helping hand (I mean tongue) in disseminating them.. Kekeke....

Isn't it amazing that no matter how much 'good' one does, it takes just one 'bad' action to totally convert him/her from hero to zero? I am no saint and I am not going to give my moral take on whether is she in the wrong or not... What I am trying to drive at is that, in society, there seems to be a need to villainise somebody or something.. The process of villainising is so crucial so as to maintain the 'common' people's goal of achieving 'social' justice... Through this process, what is defined as a socially responsible act and what is not is being clearly illustrated...

Personally, I feel it's not fair to totally blame Siti on this matter.. News and gossips are always impartial.. They are always being delivered in a manner where it is bias towards a certain perspective... For me, I believe that no person is inherently good or bad... We all have our multiple sides.. As a matter of fact, we all are schizophrenics and are constantly alternating between being Jekyll and Hyde.. We are a product of circumstances which are very place and time specific..

Therefore, let's not be blinded further by this good and evil dichotomy which seek to convince us to believe that there is a sharp distinction between both entities... Let's stop, altogether, villainising people and a good way to start at this moment is to just leave Siti Nurhaliza and her matrimonial choice alone...

(P.s. : I'm not a Siti fan by the way. Just to clarify my positionality in writing this entry)

Sacrifices

It's the weekend once again!!! Hahaha.. Some of you might ponder what the hell I am talking about coz its only Wednesday.. You see I have no school on Thursday and Friday... Kekekee.. So my weekend starts on Thursday..

Envying me huh?? Well, well... I don't really think it's that great lah... Despite having a longer 'weekend' than weekdays, tons of works have to be done.. Looking at the notes and readings that are required to be done before Monday starts again, I feel that it is simply too impossible to clear all of them man... Plus, I really have to start on my thesis research now coz I need to have a proposal and approached a lecturer to be my supervisor before the 25th of September.. Die sia... On top of all that, I have tuitions and my research job to do, a surprise 'project' to practice and rehearse and lots of other chores which I'm just too lazy and tired to list down...

At least I have start lah to think about my thesis.. I have almost decided to base it in KL, doing on the Acehnese refugees and asylum seekers in Malaysia.. Feasibility of the research is the most important I guess... After doing some calculations, I think it's time for me to make some sacrifices...

1) No more splurging!!! I have budgeted about S$1K to do my fieldwork.. Looking at my financial resources, it's really time to live on a shoe-string budget until April next year...

2) No more 'lepak-ing' that often.. Time is really running out man.. And there's so many things to do!!! Arrgghhh!!!!!!!

3) Lesser sleeping hours... Sighz.. This is the biggest sacrifice I feel.. Based on past experiences, I'm sure they'll be several occassions that I'm required to stay and ton in school to meet deadlines for presentations and reports...

4) Fewer blog entries.. Haha.. This one I guess not that bad lah...

5) Scouting for suitable suitors... Kekekee... I guess I start my 'hunt' when I go to NIE where they are many 'choices'... Lol....

Hmm.. I'm sure they are many more sacrifices I have to make lah.. That's life!!! Persevere Fadzly, persevere.... One more year (Actually less than a year)... That's all... Come May next year, YAHOOO!!! It'll all be over...

Song For You

Couldn't sleep this morning so I decided to dig out my Michael Buble's cd and listen to it again after chucking it aside for quite some time now... Fell in love with all the songs all over again... This guy is amazing.. Went to his concert the last time he touched down in Singapore.. Not only was he a great singer, he was an outstanding showman as well... (Not like that stupid guy in Singapore Idol 2 who can't sing at all...)

Just would like to share this song with all of you.. A really touching and romantic song.... Enjoy "Song For You" specially for all of you....

Feeling pooped out/ In deep shit

Been playing soccer for the past two days after a long time.. Damn!! It's enjoyable man.. But I'm not young anymore.. I pooped out easily sia after awhile... Those kids are really good and full of energy.. Guess I've passed my prime where I can run and not feeling shag so easily...

There's a difference between playing soccer and running long distance.. The former requires lots of stamina.. Need to burst and sprint every now and then.. The latter, I feel, is a lot easier... You just need to build on the momentum... Normally, the first 2km is a warm up before I'll start to enjoy the run for the next 3-4km....

Back to school tomorrow... I'm in deep shit!!! I haven't do research for three things...

1) Haven't start my thesis research at all... Heard that one of the girls in the class has already finish her fieldwork.. OohLaLa... Haha... Crazy sia!!!

2) It's been a long time since I've done any research for my lecturer... Think he's going to fire me liaoz.... Hahaa....

3) Assignments are in and I've totally disregard the requirements to do any research.. Guess I've to crap out something intellectual.. Lol...

The week which starts tomorrow is therefore crucial.. Why?? If I manage to get pass by this coming week, then I think I'll wake up from this slumber.. If not, I think I'm going to sink further into a deeper shit!!!

Farewell

Class of 206
Class of 201 Part of class 204 (No lessons with them today, so no opportunity to take a class photo...)
Class of 202

11th of August 2006, the day which I bid farewell to Bukit Panjang Government High School.. After 7 weeks of relief teaching, my stint as a relief teacher has ended.. This would also probably mark the last time I'll be holding on to that position, relief teacher...

Goodbyes are always difficult moments for me to handle.. (actually not really... I was happy to leave my work at Singapore Polytechnic.. Hehee..) The bonds and ties which were build throughout the whole period made me want to continue on working there.. However, I have to think of the long run...

I am actually at a lost of words.. Hard for me to express what I am feeling right now.. Guess what was needed to be said had been done earlier on during the day...

One thing for sure, the experience has further assures me of the decision which I had made earlier on to make teaching as my future rice bowl... It has strengthen further the passion I have for the job....

To all my students, all the best in your studies and future endeavour... Who knows, one day, we might cross each other's path again... God bless...

Celebration, Cheering, Competitions...

Champions of the Cheering Comp: 201!!!

May, Me and Kimberly enjoying ourselves during the concert

It's been 6 years since I last attended a National Day celebration in schools and so I was really looking forward to today's event.. As you can see from the second picture above, I had my face painted with the national colours... But if you look closely, I'd actually painted the crescent moon and the five stars on the wrong side of my face.. No wonder when I walked pass the discipline master, he was staring at me like one kind... He was probably thinking, "What the hell is this young, punk, relief teacher thinking he's doing?" Haha.. Too bad... He can't issue me any yellow, red or what not cards he has for offenders.. BLUEK!!

The concert ended well... 201 (one of the class which I taught) won the cheering competition.. BRAVO!!! Hehe.. Was so happy for them.. But I think my other class, 202, should be given something as well as their efforts were simply superb as well.. But that's competition.. You have winners and losers.. That's secondary I think.. The main thing is the experience gained and the moment which would be cherished forever...

Enough about celebration for the time being.. My 4th year in uni has not even officially start but already I am given assignment to do.. WTH!!! Looking at the class list and knowing the lecturer well (I shan't mention names as I found out he actually blog surf), I have a 80% chance of being called to present my findings.. SHITZZ!!! Must prepare sia...

Oh well, I'll leave that for the weekend... For now, I'm psyching myself up for tomorrow's parade... YAHOO!!! Will probably post pictures which will be taken during the parade tomorrow in my next entry... Cheers!!!

The Most Wonderful Memories

I am weak without you.

I am disappointed because of the love, that was lost from you,

which is able to respect me.

As long as the eyes are open,

until the heart stop beating.

Even till then,

I am still able to remember you

From you, I found my life

For me, you are everlasting love

When what was written for me is the best for you,

I will turn you into a memory which is the most wonderful in my life.

However, it will not be easy for me to leave my life's experiences

which are being carved forever as the most wonderful memories.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If you are thinking that I'm so creative to come out with a poetry, you OVERESTIMATED me!!! Haha... The above is actually taken from a Malay/Indonesian song, "Kenangan Terindah" by Samsons, which is my current favourite..

After reading the lyrics, and translating it, the song become much more meaningful to me.. It's something which I could relate to very well... For those kaypoh ones trying to think about the relations of the song to my life, go and figure it out yourselves.. Hehee...

Awards....

Went for the MOE Teaching Award presentation just now... Made me wear long sleeve shirt and a tie.. YUCKS!!! Hate wearing long sleeve... Anyway, they made me come at 12p.m. when the ceremony actually starts at 3... KUNTZ!!! Have to take half day off.... Not only do I lose half my pay, it's like losing the whole day pay lah coz I got saman yesterday $25 freaking bucks for parking at a lot which is reserved for residents only... KNS man...

Though I got one award, there's one award which I've been hoping to get but fail to... Sighzzz... It's the Singapore Journal of Tropical Geography Award... Went to the top dork of my batch... Oh well.... Tough luck...

One more week to a new semester... I feel kind of lost... How to switch back to student mode?? How? How??

Babies and toddlers...

Was reading my good friend's blog where he had posted some pictures of his 8 month old daughter wearing her school uniform.. How cute she is man... It's been a long time since I saw her and she seems to have grown all so much.. But her cuteness still remain intact...

Babies and toddlers.. Don't everyone find them adorable.. I couldn't help but to play with these infants and toddlers whenever I see them.. How much joy they bring to everyone's world...

However at times, I do feel a tad sad whenever I see pictures of babies and toddlers.. Maybe I was thinking of how my late younger sister would be like... Also, maybe I was thinking of the cruel fate which some of these kids might have to face due to certain circumstances which arise not due to these toddlers' faults at all. Instances would be when they are being shunned by society as they were borned out of wedlock marriages...

Worst, not feeling ashamed, I would actually shed some tears whenever I see pictures or films of babies being killed or died tragically... Innocent lives gone just when they began to learn and enjoy the world which we have selfishly lived in for the past many years since we, ourselves, were borned...

Pardon me for being so melancholic but I just couldn't help feeling this way at times... On a brighter and more positive note, all these do not deter me from aspiring to be a daddy myself when I do get married in the future... That will be one of those days which I really look forward to...