Private to Public Transition

Public transport... How I depended on it before and now, I'm back at it's mercy.. Ever since the accident, I have given up riding as for now and will be taking public transport from now on, at least until I'm done with my undergraduate life... My plans at the moment is that I'll probably get a small bike once I'm in NIE and after earning quite a bit, probably invest in a small family car..

It's been a week and I'm still trying to get used to public transport life.. No more waking up late and still making it on time.. I have to plan my schedule in more detail now... For example, in the past I only took 10 minutes to go to one of my tuition place at Jurong West. Now, it took me a freaking 45 minutes.... Sianz... It's really not easy adjusting back man after almost 3 years of having my very own transport.. Not only do I have to walk to bus stops and mrt stations now, I have to bear waiting for the freaking transport to arrive..

Well, at least I'm trying to cope lah and it's quite good.. I've learn to make full use of the time.. I'll read some of my notes while I'm on the bus or when I don't get a seat, I try to entertain myself by making fun of the people around me...

However, the good thing is that, all of a sudden, time passes by much slower... I know it's merely psychological but time seems to sweep past by very fast when you have your own transport... Another good thing: By taking public transport, I will be walking more now and I think that's good lah since I'm growing laterally quite a bit now... Hehehe...

(P.s: Take a look at the music video which I've featured.. I'm in love with this song at the moment.. Don't be fool by it's English title though.. It's actually a Malay song but with bits of English lyrics in between.. I am hunting for its MP3 now so if any of you have it, can you please kindly pass it to me.. Thanks!!)

What's next??

Woohoo!!! HADY!!! And so, the second Singapore idol had been crowned.. Just as I had expected, it's none other than Hady Mirza.. Look like it's going to be a busy life ahead of him with records to be smashed and endorsements to be signed... Now that's what his future lies ahead for him.. How about the other idol hopefuls?? With my trusted magic ball (don't think dirty people), I'm going to predict what prospects the other 11 finalists might face....

Norman: Hmm.. Think this guy will go back to his normal life.. No more stardom..

Gayle Nerva: With a face like that, I reckon that she join either the Miss Singapore-Universe peagant or The Newpaper Face of The Year contest.. Of course, she's always welcome to audition to be my baby... Babelicious lah this girl... SLURP!!! Kekekeke...

Emily Kang: One look and I know she has a chance to sign with Channel 8.. She'll probably get roles such as a dance hostess or karaoke lounge lady...

Rahimah Rahim: She could probably joined Suria and be the third daughter of Rahimah Rahim (senior) in the current cooking show-cum-drama serial.. Her screen-name: S00-Buruk!!

Mathilda: My oh my.. Did you see her dress yesterday?? Think she'll follow Olinda's footstep and will be chased by trimming agencies such as Jean Yip and Mary Chia to be their ambassador.. She needs it man.. Haha..

Nurul: She definitely will be hired by Suria.. She'll probably be one of the next host for Krayon (coz of her kiddish voice) or be acting in the next Bara (coz of her 'mina-ish' looks)

Joakim: Kids Central will come knocking on his door but they better do it fast coz a very famous organisation located in Mandai might just sweep him first.. Hehehe...

Paul Twohill: Poor boy.. With so many copy-cats around, he will lose his novelty.. He needs to do two things first... (1) Get a haircut (2) Go for speech therapy...

Jasmine Tye: She should just continue studying...

And last but not the least, Jonathan: He should give up singing and go back to complete his honours years in Political Science.. With the amount of supports he managed to garner and the witty way of sucking up for votes (apparently singing local song in the final to show the real him.. Yah rite!!), he will do well by joining the opposition parties... By the time he could contest for the next election, all the blind girls rooting for him are eligible to vote liaoz...

So there you go.. I know some of you (especially a very close friend of mine) will go like, "Wah, you criticize people number 1 ah!!" Lol... That's life man!! Everyone does it...

Centennial Post

What do you know?? This is my 100th post.. A lot had certainly happened ever since the first post that I'd put up.. I met new friends, my brother got married, my best friend got engaged, tons of my friends graduated, etc, etc, up to now where the latest being that I'd met with my recent accident...

In the past, I used to go against the idea of blogging.. It's because I'm not for the idea of people writing their personal diary and let the whole world, practically, to see it.. However, I've found that this space could be used for other purposes as well.. As for me, I used this to jot down my reflections and memories.. Also, this space could be used to remind me of all the wonderful and sad moments that I had...

On another note, I just went to the Traffic Police Headquarters just now... It went well... I gave them my version of the story as far as I could recollect... Well hope that everything went well.. I'm quite resigned to the fate that I'll probably get 6 demerit points and fined $200 bucks.. But, I hope the other parties would get the same penalty as me...

I know many of you would have ask me to fight on but I'm tired lah of all these things.. Telling everyone the whole story over and over again is simply tiring.. Furthermore, each time I had to re-tell the god-damn story, I have to remember the whole incident in my mind again.. I just want to forget about the whole thing and moved on.. There's got to be more to life than this... I don't want my life to halt just because of this freak incident... That's probably why I'm very excited to attend the class bbq that I've organised later tonight... Finally, I can do something 'normal'.. But then again, I'm sure some of my classmates would definitely ask me about the incident again over there... Sighzzz....

I'm still alive!!!

I would like to begin this entry by thanking god that I'm still alive.. I think very few of my friends knew this.. I met with an accident yesterday evening involving my bike and two cars.. It was the worst accident that I had experienced ever..

The whole thing happened all in a sudden.. I was riding along Bukit Batok East Avenue 3 and was on the right hand side of the second lane.. On the first lane, there's this red car.. It was driving straight all along but it started to drift to the left and before I could realise it, the left side of the car hit the right side of my bike.. As it hits me, a voice in me was shouting, "Oh no!!" I think it was my natural reaction to never let go of my bike... The next thing I know, I was sliding on my right hand side of my body, with my bike on me... Think the motion carries me a good 10 metres before it stops... As I hit the floor, the only thing that came into my mind is the feeling that my world is ending.. Even after I stop sliding, I'm still not sure whether am I still alive or my soul has been detached from my body...

A few seconds later, I was sure I'm still alive.. I was in deep pain.. I tried to move myself to the central divider but I can't as my bike had trapped both of my legs.. Three strangers came up to me.. Help me to lift the bike and carry me to the divider.. Those 3 turn out to be the drivers of the two cars... I felt a bit dizzy and quickly remove my helmet.. I was trembling and in a state of complete shock.. Huge abrasion cuts could be seen on my hands and my knees.. The friction between the floor and my leg had cause my jeans to be torn...

The 3 of them started to recount to me their versions of the incident.. In my current mental state, I really thought that I was totally at fault... I began to apologize to them.. But something is not right.. What they had told me don't seem to match to what I think has happened.. I totally didn't know that there was a second car involved.. Surprisingly, the second, silver coloured car claimed that I hit his front bumper first before hitting the red car.. I didn't know that really happen cause I only knew the first point of contact I had was with the red car.. One more thing: If I'm the one hitting his car, how come it is his front bumper which is damaged... Shouldn't it be his back bumper or the sides of his car?

They called the ambulance.. I grabbed my phone and made a call to my parents.. They immediately went to the scene of the accident.. I also sms my best friend, telling him about it.. He called and when I was talking to him, I broke down.. The stress and shock from the incident totally overwhelm me.. But I tried to maintain my composure after 1-2 minutes...

When the ambulance came, it was getting better.. I would like to thank the paramedics who had assisted me.. They did a great job in calming me down... That was the first time I was being carried on a stretcher and also the first time I rode in an ambulance...

During the 6 hours wait in the hospital, I was in great pain.. Could feel the sting of the abrasion... I began to feel paranoid when I could not rotate my right ankle at all... Thank goodness the x-ray showed that all my bones are fine...

That was the whole incident.. I'm sure I have left out alot more parts of it.. The reason that I'm typing this entry is because I need a space to help me straighten out my thoughts.. I have to go down to the Traffic Police HQ on Friday to give my full account of the whole incident... I need to be strong... I need to assert that I'm not to be totally blamed... Those two vehicle owners are rich ass and I have learn also that the girl driving the red car is going to engage the help of her lawyer... I guess it's really going to be a battle (Cars vs Motorbike, Rich-ass private housing dwellers vs HDB kid)... Wish me luck folks...

P.s: I'm sorry if this entry is filled with a horrid brand of English.. My mind is still reeling from the shock of the whole incident...

It rains on me

Heavy downpour.. Guess that's every biker's worst nightmare... I personally hate it when it starts to rain cats and dogs when I am riding.. Wearing a raincoat is useless.. I will still get drench somehow or rather and it is especially irritating when certain parts of your body gets soaked in water (think the guys will know what I mean... Hahaha...)

Well, it certainly rain on me just now and boy it's one god-damn fucking heavy rain!!! I was on my way to school for my General Bio lecture after finishing a tuition session earlier on in the morning... Initially, it is just drizzling so I just put on my raincoat and pray that it will remain that way till I reach school.. It didn't turn out that way... Halfway through, the rain suddenly gets heavier... FUCK!!!! I can feel my balls floating... The road ahead looks bad so I decided to stop at the nearest bus-stop... Waited for one freaking hour... There goes my good intention of going to lecture... I hate waiting man.. After awhile, I decided to continue with my journey...

Reached school alas!!! My whole body was drenched from head to toe... Ran to the toilet hoping that the hand dryer could do the trick... That piece of shit machine is simply too slow... Last resort man -DARYL!!! Called him and thank goodness he's in the Geo Lab...

At the Geo Lab, there's this huge oven which is used to dry up the sediments that were collected by Daryl and Desmond... 105 degrees celcius!!! Hot enough to dry up my jeans... Seeing that there's no one else around, I stripped down to my boxers and placed my jeans at the door of the oven..

Five minutes on, the situation looks good.. The jeans seem to be drying up when all of a sudden, the lab door opened... AARRGGHHHH!!!!!!!!! Wang Yi Zhen!!! (I purposely spell her name wrongly so that she can't google for it.. Hehehe..) Crap!!! Of all lecturer to walk in, why must it be her... Shit sia!!! There goes my NUS life I thought.. I'm probably going to be suspended from uni... Luckily, my boxer is quite long enough and it looks a bit like the normal shorts... Haha... I don't think she realized anything funny except for the fact that my jeans is hanging at the oven's door.. Lol... I think I managed to get away from that whole damn incident.... Nevertheless, I'm preparing for the worse coz she's a real bitch lah...

Well, wish me luck folks... I just pray that no more shit will happen to me.. At least for the rest of the day... I hope....

S/U Day

Wednesday... I so not looking forward to go to school.. I have 4 hours of tutorial, lab and lecture for 2 modules which I am going to S/U.. For those who don't know what S/U is, it means satisfactory/unsatisfactory.. For these modules, there'll be no grade.. All I need is an S which means a pass and rumour has it that a C+ is sufficient to qualify for an S...

First up, e-commerce tutorial.. Man, the tutor is god-damn boring lah... Force myself to take down some notes to keep awake.. At the end of the lesson, one of my group mates managed to peep at the grade which my group got for last week's presentation.. A-!!!! Hahahaha... For the amount of bullshit I said during that presentation, an A- is fantastic.. Plus, I just need a C+ remember.. Lol...

Next, General Bio lab... Was given a lab coat.. I looked damn stupid sia when I wore it.. It reminds me of a human condom.. Hahaha.... Anyway, it's the first time since sec 4 that I actually do some lab experiments... Just going through the motion and having fun (of course with the occassional ooohh and aaaahhh due to the amazement of seeing my own cheek cells...) The questions are pretty simple.. Besides, I got the help of my younger sis who is doing a diploma in Bio-medical Engineering and my e-commerce group mates who are life science majors.. Hahaha..

Finally, e-commerce lecture... Its on the topic of advertising online.. Boring sia.. Pretty much have learn that when I did Marketing last year... The funny thing is to see the lecturer scolding the whole class as we totally boh-chup the interactive exercise she had planned... That whole 5 minutes reminds me of my secondary school days sia.. Haha..

Hmmm... After all that, it seems that Wednesday isn't all that bad... Come to think about it, it actually helps to ease my tired mind... Tomorrow, Thursday... Free day!! Well, not really... I have a group discussion for another up and coming presentation followed by tuition at night... Alright, going to do some readings but only after Singapore Idol... HADY!!!! Ciaoz peeps!!!

Touched

Was doing some research when one of my ex-colleague msn me... He told me to read Monday's Berita Harian.. So I went to search for it and browse through it.. What greeted me on page 10 simply touches me... One of my ex-students in BPGHS had actually written a 'sajak' (poetry) and have dedicated it to both my ex-colleague and me.. It is simply unexpected.. After all, I'm just a relief teacher... Nevertheless, that poetry further spur me on to make teaching my life-long occupation...

To Khairool, if you are reading this, thanks for the dedication (though I can't totally comprehend the whole poetry as his command of the Malay language is simply too good for me.. Hahaha...)

Self or Others??

Today prove to be something of an accomplishment for me.. I finally got the signature of my supervisor.. That also signals an end to the first stage of my thesis that is to come up with a research topic.. However, due to my own accomplishment, I felt in a way, I had deprived one of my friends' chance of getting the same lecturer to be his supervisor as well due to the quota, imposed by the faculty, pertaining to the number of students each supervisor is able to take in...

Competition... That dreaded 'C' word which is very real in our everyday lives... It seems that the obsession with this word has very much overshadow the importance of other 'C' words such as collaboration, community, co-operation, etc... It is really a dog-eat-dog world out there..

In my attempt to reduce the level of competition in the honours class, I have seem to contribute and propagate further this selfish act... I really hate myself for that.. Why is there a constant need to choose between either self or others?? Why can't every time be a 'we' moment where both self and others are being fused together??

In retrospect, my life has been full of struggles and tussles between these two entities.. For instance, many people I met have always been shocked about the ridiculously low rates that I charged for my tuition services... If I have a choice, I would charge according to the market prices but I do need to think about the socio-economic circumstances of the kids, and their parents, as well... After all, I do share similar circumstances...

Another example would be the drive to attain a first class honours.. Though there is the personal prestige and own sense of achievement, I feel that the main reason that push me to continue and strive to achieve this accolade is to make my parents' proud.. Though they might not know the 'real' difference of a first class from a second upper class, in their own limited vocabulary, they can make the distinction between what is 'first' and what is 'second'... I feel that there is a need of 're-paying' their sacrifices after all these years and the first among the infinite number of steps in accomplishing this is to graduate with a 'good' degree... If I really do have a choice, I do want to stop worrying and being stressed out about my academic results and let nature takes its own course... After all, it's just a bloody paper qualification!!!

Perhaps, a world which is void of competition and the tussles between 'self' and 'others' only exist in the utopian state of the human's mind... Perhaps, it's time for me to grapple with the realities of the 'real' world... Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps....

One Last Cry

Just finished watching the film 'I am Sam'... It's really a damn touching film.. I rushed home from my grandma's house just to catch it though I had caught it once before... Sean Penn, Michelle Pfeiffer and Dakota Fanning are simply awesome... Had to hold back my tears cause my youngest sis was watching with me.. Lol...

Talking about crying, I heard this song over the radio when driving home... This song never fails to conjure up my emotional side each time it's played on air... Enjoy it, 'One Last Cry' by Brian McKnight!!!

New specs, new topic

Just got back from Causewaypoint to collect my new pair of specs.. Yeah!!! Finally, after 7 long years, a brand new pair of specs... Must really take good care of this one coz it cost me quite a bomb!!! Think I look good sia.. Eh no, I mean the specs further enhanced my charm... Hahaha... All I need now is a haircut but at the moment I just can't find the time to do so.... Sighz...

Okok, enough rambling for now... Back to my thesis research.. By the way, I had cancelled my plans of doing my thesis in KL due to the overwhelming commitments I have... Trying to formulate a proposal now for the new thesis topic but I just can't!!! HELP!!! Deadline for the proposal is in 18 days time... ARGGHH!!!

Fear Tamer

Before I start off this entry, let's observe a minute of silence to someone well-loved by many... No no no... Not George Bush (though I do wish it is... Kekeke...)

Australia seems to be mourning as they lost one of their 'heroes' in modern times: Steve Irwin... A man who is said to be very courageous and adventurous. Someone who is not afraid of the 'wild'....

You might be wondering why do I place both Steve Irwin and George Bush side by side... After all, they are two very different individuals who don't seem to share much similar traits... Think again... Steve Irwin has always been applauded for his ability to tame one of humankind's greatest fear; the wild and the animals living in it... On the other hand, George Bush can also be said to be someone who has (and forever will) try taming another fear which humankind has come to understand; 'terrorists'...

Heroes?? I don't think so... Both are said to be actively trying to deal with the threats faced by humankind's 'others' but these 'others' are just mere social constructions, being formulated so as to legitimize the supremacy of those with vested interests...

Disrespectful?? Out of taste?? That's certainly not my agenda in this entry but I just want to evoke some critical thoughts among those who are reading this... Another issue to think about... Why do Steve's death are being mourned by the whole world but the lost of so many Lebanese' lives are so simply forgotten and not felt??

Growing Old?

I still can remember all so vividly when Singapore celebrated it's 25th National Day.. Fast forward to today, we have already reached the 41st mark... Guess what?? Next year, I will be turning 25 myself.. YIKES!!! I do not want to wake up tomorrow and find myself being 41... I feel that I am growing old way too fast...

There are times, either subconsciously or consciously, that I would deny that I am ageing.. Who wouldn't right? Five years ago, while serving my national service, friends would ask me what I am going to do in the future. I would normally reply that I'm still young to think about so many things in the future... Now, I would still give a similar answer.. But the truth is, I'm not that young anymore.. 24 might sounds like a small number but if you add one more year and then multiply it by four, you will be a century years old...

Everyday, before taking a shower, I will, without fail, take a look at myself in the mirror.. No signs of wrinkles but my hair simply give it away.. The amount of white hair I could spot keep reminding me of the truth... I AM GETTING OLD!!!! Arrghhh!!! There's so much more I think I can do and achieve in this life... Will I be able to do all that before becoming an old fogey?? Only time can tell...

Holiday Deprivation

Ever since entering into uni, I had never failed to go overseas for a holiday during the May to August break... This year is an exception.. I missed the feeling of having to weigh my luggage at the airport, flying, checking into hotels, travelling around another person's country and enjoying the 'natural' sceneries which I am deprived of in Singapore.... Basically, I NEED A BREAK from the hectic life in Singapore annually...

I would be rejuvenated and feel afresh each time I came back from overseas, revitalising the energy that had been zapped out of me... This year, no such thing man.. That's probably why I'm feeling like shit when the new academic year started... I thought of going overseas for the mid-sem break but checking the calendar, it coincidentally falls on Ramadhan.. Damn it!!!

Oh well, someday maybe, when I'm earning big bucks.. Only then will I be able to afford to take as many holidays as I want.. Dream, Dream, Dream....